We don’t notice the threads being woven together or consider even what goes into creating the fabric of our lives until it comes time to make alterations.
When our choices no longer fit our preferences or become uncomfortable in our daily activities, habits, or thoughts- that’s when we stop to analyze the situation. That is where I found myself recently. Looking back over the last 18 months as an outsider viewing a movie reel, I noticed the words being spoken didn’t match the movements on the screen and there were no subtitles.
I read the script. It held the narrative of freedom in the life of a woman no longer bound by the shackles of abuse. A woman exploring the freedom of independence and empowerment. This woman knew how to take charge of her life. So it seemed. Yet, she had a weakness for being loved and fell to the wills of those who claimed to love her. What did she know of love though?
What I saw on the screen was a sad story of a woman unable to discern toxic narcissistic traits, who fell for every manipulative trick of his lips. Not one set, but several. Each one catered to a different need she thought was getting fulfilled but in reality was just smoke and mirrors. Her kindness twisted and contorted to appear as if he/they were doing the loving but it was her. It was always her because she had pure intentions, they did not.
Then God spoke.
This forgotten voice played a new movie reel for her to see and that’s all it took. She was offered the starring role in the best movie ever made and suddenly the fabric closest to her flesh needed major alterations. First thing she did was cut out the painful past; not all of the past, just the parts that still hurt. She created safe spaces around her for herself and for her friends and took new measurements. The fun part began when she had to select new fabrics.
With a catalogue of resolutions and affirmations, she began designing her future. Something wasn’t lining up though. Each time the new movie tried to play it would just get stuck at the same place. Something wasn’t fitting so she brought out the stitch ripper and began to completely separate integral threads in the fabric of her life. Gone were the pictures and emails, text messages and profile pictures, along with jewelry, perfume and household gifts that had taken up residency in her home. She ripped out every single thread that was keeping her soul tied to another from the past until they were all gone-deleted, blocked, destroyed, and banned from ever returning.
In this movie, the words heard on screen were perfectly choreographed with the stunning visuals. This she thought was true freedom and a welcoming invitation for integrity, honor, loyalty and love. She acknowledged that she knows nothing of real love but with trust and hope in God she is reshaping her expectations and preparing her heart with open arms.
When these garments are recreated to align her newly visioned future there will be no doubt whose hands did the sewing. There will no longer be a need for the stitch ripper nor the shears for the one who holds the future is the one who holds her heart.